What does it mean to choose? When have to make a choice between things, what are we really doing to ourselves? I have always struggled with choice. Choice. Choosing. To choose is to not have. At least that is how I have always seen it. The idea that if I have to choose between this career or that career, in the end it means that I will not have that career I did not choose. This has seemed to me to be a terrible loss. I am greedy. I want it all. Don’t you? Don’t we all want it all? Weren’t we taught as women that we could have it all? But we can’t really. Not like that. To have it all means something different to me on this rainy morning.
When my husband left for work this morning he complained that it was raining. I said, “Honey we need the rain. We are in a drought.” He paused and looked at me. Smiling he said, “I know. But I love when it is sunny out.” Yes, I thought. I love it when it is sunny out too. I want it to be sunny all the time. But really, I want my garden to grow and I want my children to have good water to swim in and drink. So, I love the rain too. We want it all, but we really don’t. The rainy days make the sunny days that much better. The seasons serve a higher purpose. They remind us of the passing of time and allow us to appreciate each part of the year with more poignancy and awe.
A full life is about choices, but choosing something is not necessarily the loss of something else. It is really the acceptance of what you really need and want in your life. It is accepting and embracing your true self. Your true nature. The loss of something not chosen is part of the beauty of this life. If we could have it all, at once, it would lose its meaning and life would cease to be as precious as it really is.
Embrace the choice. For it is what makes us unique and good. I will not mourn the life not chosen anymore. I will celebrate the life I have. Choose wisely and you will be wise.
Lisa Jo Baker has an interesting task every Friday. She calls it Five Minute Friday and it is a writing exercise posited around a particular prompt. You write to the prompt for a total of five minutes, uninterrupted, unedited, and then you link your writing to her site. As well, you go back and read two entries and comment on them.
She has, in effect, created a writer’s workshop. I love this and find it fun to participate in whether or not I had a blog. It is about the writing after all.